For most of us, tension has become a normal part of our day-to-day lives. When we want to be intimate with someone, that tension creates a barrier between their heart and yours; between their body and yours. Tension in your body also causes your mind to be overly busy. Learning to relax is on of the most useful keys for deeper enjoyment of sexual intimacy with a lover. Here is one way to practice conscious relaxation:

“In the midst of the whirlwind of our daily lives, we can take a ten second break. We can choose to put our attention deep inside, under the emotion. We can release our attention from the narrative of who did what, or why something should or should not have happened. Under all the stories that relate to a particular emotion, there is just the vibration of the emotion itself. Without the usual accompanying story and judgment, the feeling can be simply, directly experienced. In this direct experience of emotional sensation, a startling discovery happens.

In this small amount of time you can discover what lives under all emotion: the undisturbed cleanliness of internal open space.
What follows may surprise you. Time may actually expand. Breath can come more freely. The opportunity to say what needs to be said may present itself. You are at peace with yourself and your emotions.”

Gangaji